Archive for the ‘Preseason’ Category

The summer of our discontent.

Thursday, March 20th, 2008

Since the final siren of the year Kevin ‘07, we’ve endured the painful sports period of Octvember, replete with inbred boofheads cheering on inbred racing cars over a smallish mountain and little fellas in pyjamas whipping the life out of poor old nags. Then a couple of months of leather on willow, split by a tournament where a squillion East Europeans descend on a small patch of hot concrete to hit furry green objects with force at each other. It would be more entertaining, nay … more efficient, if they just tried to hit the ball where the opponent *wasn’t*… but that’s a topic for another time. And finally, the worst (and most appropriate) trophy in sporting history has just been awarded to the best team of the local association football league.

So, here we are.

Not more than a few moments from the first Sherrin bounced in true anger… although Ray Chamberlain doesn’t actually umpire until Saturday arvo. Applauding the Collingwood membership team for getting the 08 scarf out just in time for the Picans’ first southern escapade, despite Mrs Pica’s membership card still not present.

Exhausted, after hammering away for what seems like the full length of the last half of the ‘03 GF, at every single footy tipping and fantasy comp I got invited to this long offseason, for no particular reason other than the “blow yer own trumpet” rights over the various Bomber, Hawk, Swan and other citizens who make up our social nest. An old uni notebook with a month or so of hastily scribbled Kilometrico thoughts on pre-season performances sitting by my side. Laid a few quiet wagers (Mrs. P doesn’t read this site…. yet) on various single game and end of season results, including a “never-again” one on an NAB cup result. Thanks for the tip, Paul Roos.

Knowing full well that it’s the optimum time to get the mates all committed to various trips and events. The premiership window is wide open, and the squeaky hinges doused liberally with rose coloured WD40. Everyone* obscenely optimistic about their team’s cup chance in 2008. One club investing all their hope, and fair whack of their salary cap, in a possibly dodgy groin. Not that the cap limit proved to be a barrier for that particular team… more of a loose guide. The good footy mates from way back, a Bomber and a Hawk fan, already ticketed (aka financially committed) and set for a Queen’s Birthday sojourn to catch Essendon/Hawthorn and Collingwood/Melbourne. Mrs Pica, a Pies fan since we met**, already having blacked out the ANZAC day holiday on the family year planner, with only a tiny bit of nudging from your correspondent, honest.

Which brings us up to now…. settling down in front of the telly, the aroma of meat pie from the local bakery + mash and veggies, wafting in from the kitchen, no more appropriate way to bounce the first ball on the new footy season.

* apart from Richmond and Melbourne fans embarking on their annual 2nd year of a 5 year plan.

** to be elaborated upon in one of the Round One Collingwood v. Fremantle posts.

Well, that was quick…

Thursday, March 6th, 2008

… seems like the Collingwood brain trust agreed with FP and Monty is the skip for 2008.

mr_20burns.jpg

“Ehhhhhhxcellent!”

What’s more… they’ve taken on board the FP suggested succession plan of Josh as vc, and possible future captain, although speculation is that Pendles is being groomed for the 2009 season. Either way, good to see a sensible short and long term leadership strategy in place, and a long time Magpie stalwart rewarded for the decade plus of quiet achievement.

Although… a quote from The Age article linked above leads me to wonder if he’s been partly selected on the ability to produce Malthousian obtuse statements.

“It’s a big honour but I don’t feel like I’m out there in front of anyone and definitely not above the boys behind me,” Burns said referring to Fraser and the three deputies.

So there you have it. The captaincy role as sketched by M.C. Escher.

el capitano

Tuesday, March 4th, 2008

Sometime in the next 48 hours , the Collingwood F.C will announce a season captain not named Buckley for the first time this millennium. With international media conglomerates ready to converge on Swan St (or somewhere around the bustling metropolis of Shepparton, should the announcement come Friday evening), it’s high time to look at the pros and cons of the options available.

  • Tarkyn Lockyer – Long term Pie, has come back brilliantly from a knee reco in 03. Despite racking up possessions doesn’t seem to have the presence off-field, and possibly unfairly, doesn’t fit the Buckley “lead on the field” type captaincy.
  • Josh Fraser – Poor old underappreciated Josh, who has never been able to live up to “Greatest Ruckman Ever” billing when drafted #1 in 99. Also doesn’t fit the Buckley mould (who does?), but appears very comfortable in the media spotlight, and may lift game to new level in a captaincy position. History of injuries, however.
  • Nick Maxwell – Inspirational youngster who ticks all the onfield endeavour boxes, but may not be picked in the best 22 for every game, particularly if the younger backmen, like Brown, Jack Anthony or Haraldo come on.
  • Scott Burns – Oldest Pie left, deserves the position purely on career to date but might just be reaching end of mileage, aka Bucks in 07. Is rotated on/off bench frequently.
  • Surprise youngster/dark horse – E.g. Scott Pendlebury, Cloke the Third or Alan Didak.

It’s not rocket surgery.*

Here’s the simple plan.

2008 – Scott Burns (c) , Josh Fraser (vc) – Monty assumes the mantle, yes, partly due to the unfortunate early retirement of the Backline General, but also on the back of 7+ years of slogging it out quietly but effectively in the centre square , and resurrecting his career after a lean patch in the late 90’s .The baby Maggies could do a lot worse than emulating Monty’s onfield presence and off-field demeanour and application. Speaking of the youngsters, the most likely future captains (Heath, Pendles etc) get involved in the leadership group for this season, exposing them to the expectations and demands.

2009 – Josh Fraser (c), one of Heath Shaw/Maxwell/Cloke/Pendles (vc) – Burns retires, as expected, with silverware in hand. Rogan Josh, who has spent a year observing Burns and carries himself similarly outside the arena, moves up to the captaincy, and whoever of the young turks impresses the most in the leadership group of 08, gets the vice, in a kind of pre-WorkChoices apprenticeship role. However… depending on Josh’s and health (always a concern) there’s always the option of the mini Pies doing a Prince William and leapfrogging into the throne.

2010+ #25 leads until he can lead no more, and the vc neatly moves into a long term Buckley-esque reign . At this point in time, the most likely IMO, would be Heath Shaw, Pendlebury or Cloke MkIII, who’ve been groomed for the role, and earned their teammates respect as leaders, over the previous few years and slot right in. Next Gen Pies – repeat process re: the vc role.

So that’s it. It’s a simple Castro/Bush style succession plan, with Burnsy unveiled as the “comandante-in-chief” any moment now.

*rocket surgery claim dependent on Burns actually wanting to be captain. It should be noted he’s the only one of the 4 who hasn’t expressed interest in the role.